Autumn comes quicker each year
And so do the memories of you
Floods of them
From where I buried them last year

Raking leaves by your side
Knowing what lay in store for us when we finished
A pile of leaves
That could be anything we wanted

Our faces red with cold
As we sipped hot chocolate
And picked the leaves
Out of each other’s hair

The trees we climbed
To take pictures from the top of the world
And the forts we made
Larger and grander each time

Sitting at your kitchen table
Eating noodles in silence
Reassured
By the other’s presence

Now I can’t stand fall
Every shade of orange
Every crunch of the leaves
Every breath of crisp air

It makes me believe that you will be back
I stare at the phone for hours
Willing you to call and invite me over
But deep down knowing it’s not possible

I go to bed at night
Wishing and hoping on every star
That we can share one more evening under
The twinkling windows to heaven

And when our song comes on the radio
I try to sing along
But I can’t
I don’t know your part

How can I move on
When you were half my past
Half my life
Half of me

I try to forget
Like everyone tells me to
But every year
Autumn comes again