"To Whomever May Get This Letter"

Immaculate Conception School
Monroe County, IL

I shouldn’t be here, talking to you.
But fate has brought me,
To this sheet of paper and a pen…
So I write…
I hope I don’t get writer’s block,
For I do not have much time…
I should be silent, not saying one word.
But rules are rules,
“Not meant to be heard.”
To think about thinking is all but a thought.
But me right here,
Sitting on this bed,
Thinking is all I can do.
I think about the people,
How they run about-
Running, racing, as fast as they can.
Not a worry in their minds…
For me it’s different,
Yes, how sad…
All I can do, is think.
Think and write throughout the day,
Not stopping for a glass to drink.
For a glass to drink, I do not have,
In this tiny room.
And in this tiny room, is nothing.
All I can see, is a window that’s been barred up.
Outside the window, it looks like death.
So grey, so cold, I can’t stand it…
I wish I could be with the people I love,
But oh I have tough luck…
Because all I have are thoughts of them,
Of those I cherish dearly.
What is wrong you say?
It’s hard to speak of it,
Yes, it is that bad.
They say I’m going insane,
Do you think so?
I don’t.
I don’t know what happened,
It’s really all but a blur…

I can’t talk to anyone but myself.
I wish I could talk to my wife,
And three kids. But I can’t,
And that is all there is to it.
I want to go home, I really do, but I can’t,
And that’s all there is to it.
I wish I could just walk out this door,
Break this lock that’s making me insane.
But I can’t, and that is all there is to it.
Do you know how it feels?
To be mentally insane?
To be locked up in a room,
With no contact with anyone?
It is bad. Yes, so bad.
It makes me cry.
It makes me want to die.
I know I’ve been bad,
But can’t we forgive?
Apparently not.
Oh, what a shame.
He said I would be out, on November 29th,
But it’s a lie I tell you.
I can’t even remember what I’m talking to you for.
I want you to take this letter to anyone you can,
The police, or your folks.
Tell them that you found it on the street,
And you think it is a plea for help.
A plea for help,
To save me from these people.
So please do whatever it takes to save me.
These terrible people are hurting me, oh yes.
Hurting me so bad.
Again, do what ever it takes,
To save my sad, sad soul.

With love and care,
You know whom.